Perfect Family Tales And Other Trivia

The art of the short-story writer is that of the cartoonist. It is the magical craft of creating entire worlds with a few simple strokes of a pen. Tales told by an idiot? Maybe! But my tales are also a mix of reality and fantasy; truth and lies; some based on my own family; others, not. Readers must guess which characters are real; who are inventions - and who are an amalgam of both. Please draw the boundaries for yourself.

Friday, 16 March 2012

‘Eat Me’

Alice was on the late shift at The Mark Addy.

She wiped the bar, counted the final takings and stashed them in the safe.

“’Night!”. she called across to Steve. “See y’later!”

“See ya luv!”

And as Alice left The Addy, she picked up her bag and smoothed  her top over her jeans.

Her favourite plain white tank top.

Just tight enough to show  her curves.

Apple.Eat.Me.Tank.TopJust adorned with a plump, juicy, bright red apple.

Just enough sauce for bar room banter.

Just two words.

“Eat me!” smirked the slogan.

And Arnie, spotting Alice turn into New Bailey Street, slowed his car.

Just offered her a lift with ‘just a bite to eat’.

Alice fetched up just three days later in the River Irwell. Not even Mark Addy could save her.

Just another story for the Manchester Evening News.

“That’s just life,” said the famous Salford pub’s  tap room philosopher.

So just who’s got the t-shirt now?


Natalie Wood

(Copyright, Natalie Irene Wood – 15 March 2012)

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